A DANCER.

A dancer discovers music everywhere. He knows that life in itself is an orchestra of nature’s instruments, a collection of the universe’s melodies. He sees everything around him moving rhythmically as if all things have their own cadence.

A dancer knows that this is how life works: it works in a flowing motion. Like a trained dancer, his very own reflex is to feel the beat, follow the melody and move along with the rhythm. He doesn’t fight the music, but drowns himself in it instead, savoring every note with style, as if it were the last few notes on earth. He flutters around with the music of life pulsating in his veins: the excitement, the joy, the energy: the giving away of every inch of muscles, every bead of sweat, every particle of mind.

A dancer understands perfectly that the key to everything lies in harmony, balance, and a splash of spontaneity. He knows that life is the magical tunes he had been carrying in his heart since the day he was born, and as always, he will only need to follow the tempo, surrender to the sensation and dance it away.

A SKY-GAZER.

A sky-gazer knows that looking out into space is like looking back in time. On a starry night, he’s the one who will be touched by the romantic melancholy of how the stars could have actually died a very long time ago, way before its light reached his very eyes.

A sky-gazer, thus, appreciates how his past defines the way he sees the world as he sees it now. He understands the beauty of embracing what’s gone, not to be replaced by something else (because he believes that the things of the past are irreplaceable), but to be carried inside his heart: a keepsake as he walks his way to the future. At times, it serves as a reminder—to live life to the fullest, to not holding back too much; and at other times as a blanket—to keep him warm with loving memories or to snuggle inside when things become ugly.

A sky-gazer knows that looking at the future is like gazing at the night sky. Deep down inside, we’re actually looking back in time to who we were and who we used to be. A sky-gazer receives this knowledge like something that has been written in his DNA: that life always flows to the future carrying everything from the past along, and nothing is left behind.

A LOVER.

A lover loves and nothing else matters. He knows that love isn’t pink; it can be black or white or maroon and other times bluish purple. He accepts the fact that love draws tears as much as it draws laughter, but he doesn’t mind. He understands that roses have thorns and that thorns have roses. A lover realizes the perfection that lies behind tiny imperfections, the flickers of words beneath those shy-looking eyelashes, the thirst of grape-flavored kisses inside empty wine glasses, the yearning of togetherness beyond every goodbye clenches.

A lover falls for the beauty of an unmade bed and stains of paints on a white fence, the solitude of a buzzing traffic jam and cries of seagulls above the sand, the charm of getting soaked under the rain and playing catch under the blazing sun, the fondness of plunging into a quarrel and feeling the pain of a mistake unrepaired. A lover appreciates sadness as a way to alleviate the beloved’s tears and embraces happiness as a reason to shower the beloved with marshmallow-tempered caresses and sweet-sugary sentences.

A lover knows that he has no other thirst but to love—even when he realizes that the thirst will never get quenched.

A lover loves and nothing else matters.

———————————–

*) a gift for a dancer, a sky-gazer, a lover, and a very dear friend. Kuala Lumpur, February 2012.

hanny
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Pertemuan denganmu itu adalah salah satu dari serangkaian kebetulan yang berjatuhan di atas diri saya beberapa waktu belakangan ini. Dan saya tidak bisa mengeluh. Semuanya adalah rangkaian kebetulan yang menyenangkan. Yang bertahan sebentar-sebentar tetapi meninggalkan kesan yang bisa membuat saya tersenyum-senyum sendiri selama berbulan-bulan kemudian. Yang membuat saya masih saja terheran-heran karena semua yang ada dalam imajinasi saya tiba-tiba menjelma jadi kenyataan.

Dan kita bukannya terlambat. Saya rasa, selama ini, kita selalu bertemu pada saat yang tepat. Ada saat-saat ketika kamu belum siap, ada saat-saat ketika saya belum siap, tetapi pada waktunya kita selalu berpapasan di tengah jalan. Menyusurinya bersama-sama tanpa perlu berjalan beriringan. Bukankah kamu yang pernah bilang bahwa segala sesuatu akan jatuh tepat pada tempatnya jika waktunya tiba?

Bertemu denganmu lagi menjadi sesuatu yang istimewa, karena saya merasa bahwa sekarang saya bisa bercerita padamu tentang apa saja. Pada akhirnya saya menemukan kamu yang bisa membuat saya merasa nyaman menjadi diri saya sendiri dan mengoceh dengan bodohnya mengenai berbagai hal yang bahkan membuat kamu terkaget-kaget setelahnya. Sesuatu yang tak pernah bisa saya lakukan sebelumnya, ketika saya masih berpegangan padamu erat-erat.

Bukankah ini seperti satu lingkaran sempurna? Hidup mengulang dirinya lagi, dan lagi, dan lagi, dan kemudian kamu tertawa begitu kamu sudah mengerti dengan jelas pola macam apa yang ditinggalkannya. Pada akhirnya, kamu paham.

Dan begitulah. Saya menemukan bahwa ada banyak hal yang ditawarkan hidup ke hadapan saya begitu saja, secara tiba-tiba, ketika saya bahkan tidak meminta atau mengharapkannya. Kemudian saya mengerti. Semua doa-doa saya, bahkan doa-doa yang sudah begitu lama tertumpuk berdebu dalam buku-buku harian saya, ternyata selalu didengarkan Tuhan. Hanya saja, jawaban dari semua doa-doa itu baru diantarkan ke hadapan saya beberapa waktu belakangan ini. Dan semuanya dikabulkan sekaligus. Beriringan. Berselang setiap beberapa hari sekali. Membuat saya ingin menangis dan tertawa sekaligus.

Mungkin selama ini, Tuhan hanya menunggu waktu yang tepat. Waktu ketika saya sudah benar-benar siap. Tidak ada yang terlambat. Doa-doa saya dikabulkan tepat ketika saya sudah belajar melepaskan.

hanny
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Not a single day pass without the thoughts of you.
A scenery of beauty is everything you say or do.

Run to the shores—and find me when things got blue.
But bear with me, and my chattery ways of loving, too.

I see the world through you and everything seems new.
Give your dreams a chance, you said, and they will come true.

– Menjelang senja di Blue Point, Uluwatu –

hanny
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Indeed, the eastern part of Indonesia is breathtakingly beautiful! I have always wanted to visit the faraway Molucca Archipelago—well-known for its wonderful beaches and magical underwater views; one of the best site for diving in the world, according to my diver friends.

And I was lucky for being able to set foot there!

From the city center of Ambon or from the Pattimura Airport, it took only 30-45 minutes by car to reach this magical Natsepa Beach.

After paying an entrance fee of IDR 2,000 (or around US$ 0.2), you can enjoy the stretch of white sand and the seductive view of the faraway hills. The sea is calm and the water is clean, very ideal for bathing and swimming. Trees are growing along the beach, perfect for a shelter from the sun!

Ambon had suffered from ethno-religious clashes—the worst took place in 1999 (until recently, some countries are still issuing travel warnings for their citizens who’d like to travel to this part of Indonesia). Since then, several parties have been trying to shake the city’s peacefulness. However, the youths in Ambon won’t let it happen. Consisting of youths from different social classes, religions and backgrounds, they are trying to promote tolerance and respect through a peaceful movement, Badati Ambon.

When you’re visiting Natsepa Beach in Ambon, you have to try the famous Rujak Natsepa. There are tents along the front of the beach, with local women behind a stack of fresh fruits, selling traditional fruit salad called ‘rujak’–a suitable treat after a sunny day at the beach.

Rujak Natsepa is made of a mixture of tropical fruits: pineapple, mango, starfruit, papaya, rose apple (water guava), bangkuang (jicama/mexican turnip), and cucumber. These sliced fruits are then mixed with a paste of peanuts and brown sugar; you can choose whether you’d like to add some chili into it or not. For a plate of fresh and fruity Rujak Natsepa, you need to pay around IDR 10,000 or US$ 1.

And sipping fresh coconut afterwards? 🙂

Early in the morning, you can also walk around the traditional street-market and find fresh vegetables/spices, as well as fresh/salted fish! Ambon is a heaven for seafood lovers! 🙂

Let’s go exploring more beautiful places in the eastern part of the country! (As for the travel warning, the only warning I’d like to give you is: you wouldn’t want to go home after this).

————–

*) special thanks to Almascatie and friends from Badati Ambon for the hospitality 🙂

hanny
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Dia adalah nada-nada dalam hidupku. Kadang kuat, kadang samar. Tapi pada setiap langkah yang tersesat, aku selalu bisa mendengar nada-nada itu, bahkan dengan mata terpejam. Seperti pasir yang basah, seperti ombak, air dingin yang merendam mata kakiku dan dermaga yang hangat; nada-nada itu menyelimutiku seperti matahari, lautan, dan lengkingan burung-burung pantai di musim panas.

@beradadisini for Lelakiku

Belakangan aku tahu, namamu berarti nada-nada, irama, musik. Begitulah aku akan mengingatmu.

Kamu seperti nada-nada yang diterbangkan angin dari tempat yang sangat jauh. Aku menangkap nada-nada itu ketika sunyi jatuh. Seperti sihir. Aku memejamkan mataku dan mereguk suara-suara yang mengelilingi kepalaku, melingkupi hatiku, merambati jari-jemariku. Seperti Freddie dalam adegan-adegan awal August Rush, aku mendengar musik pada setiap degup jantung, denting sendok dan piring, hela napas, angin, rintik hujan, dekuk burung hantu.

Ada sesuatu dalam nada-nada itu yang membuatku ringan. Aku tidak berjalan, aku melayang.

Kuikuti nada-nada itu (tidak mudah, karena terkadang nada-nada itu memelan dan menghilang ketika suara-suara lain menelan), lalu…

aku menemukanmu.

Tetapi kamu tidak sedang menyanyi. Kamu sedang berdoa. Sesungguhnya, kamu sedang memanggilku.

hanny
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Raat din gardish mein hai saat asmaan. Ho rahega kuch na kuch ghabrayen kya.
Day and night the planets are in motion. Something will work out, why worry ourselves.
– Ghalib –

A wanderer told me once:

You can’t fill a glass that’s already full of water to the brim with wine. The wine will just continue to spill out. You need to emptied the glass first. The emptier the glass, the more wine can be contained. The more wine can be contained, the more wine can be poured in. The more wine can be poured in, the more wine can be sipped. It’s actually quite similar to your heart. When it’s full of past memories or future expectations, it just can’t contain the present love that is coming your way. This new love will continue to spill out. You need to emptied your heart first, ensuring that you have let go of the past and stop worrying about the future. Let your heart be vacant for a while and give a chance for the present love to fill you in.

The wanderer is right. I emptied my heart last week, and you came like a downpour. You are too sweet to be true, and I find it hard to refrain myself from being addicted to you.

hanny
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Hanny illustrator
Hi. I'm HANNY
I am an Indonesian writer/artist/illustrator and stationery web shop owner (Cafe Analog) based in Amsterdam, the Netherlands. I love facilitating writing/creative workshops and retreats, especially when they are tied to self-exploration and self-expression. In Indonesian, 'beradadisini' means being here. So, here I am, documenting life—one word at a time.

hanny

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