“A person who could not lead himself won’t be able to lead others”

I came to understand the ultimate truth behind these words just a few days ago …

I won’t consider myself as a good leader (I need to improve my personal qualities on that particular area), but I think I am a good follower. Being a good follower means, you let the leader to guide you through. You let the leader show you the way. You take orders. I have never had problems of becoming a follower–until one day, I came to doubt my own qualities of becoming a good follower … :p

Probably I’m just trying to defend myself … hahahaha, however … it’s hard to follow someone who doesn’t know where he is going. That’s the reason why I have problems working with disorganized people and those who doesn’t have time management skills. I do have problems following those who changes minds every once and a while, or suddenly changes directions without further consideration of the consequences that might happen afterwards. It’s hard to follow someone who constantly breaks the deal that had been settled earlier. It’s hard when someone told you to work on file-C and before you have even finished, he said,”Leave that unfinished. Now work on file-B and file-D!” And moreover, it’s so damn hard to keep calm when you have to follow someone who gets panic during a crisis and start yelling at everyone–who doesn’t deserve to be yelled (since actually they have been very helpful).

I know it’s hard to be a good leader. Sometimes the circumstances just stressed you out. But, let’s face it, a good leader has to know how to motivate people, to appreciate an effort instead of a result, to stay calm under pressure, and taking control of the situation when everything went wrong. A good leader must be able to lead himself, and then show us the way into the light.

Well, apart from that, just because someone is not a good leader (yet), it doesn’t automatically means that one is a bad person (the same thing goes for followers). You could be such a loveable person without having to become a good leader. Really.
It takes time (and “patience”, everyone! *note*) to be a good leader.

So, it’s OK if you can’t really lead, or can’t really follow. At least we could try not to become a pain in the ass for others. Hmm, to be honest, sometimes I become a pain in the ass for others :p –especially when I’m not feeling well, hehehe (so please forgive me, fellows … !!!).

To wrapped it up, I came up with a conclusion … that being unhappy & unhealthy at the same time is such a dangerous combination! Trust me. I’ve been there … at that particular time you won’t be able to follow. To lead? In your dream!!!


If you made it this, far, please say 'hi'. It really means a lot to me! :)

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Beradadisini Love Letter to Self
I took up a personal journaling project this week: writing a love letter to myself before bed. I work on a thin A6-size handmade paper journal I got from a paper artist, Els. The journal is thin and small enough, so it doesn't overwhelm me. It feels like I am only going to work on a small project.
Standing up for yourself does not have to look aggressive. It does not have to feel like a fight. It's not always about convincing others or explaining yourself and your decisions with the hope that everyone else understands or accepts your choice.
Hanny illustrator
I am an Indonesian writer/artist/illustrator and stationery web shop owner (Cafe Analog) based in Amsterdam, the Netherlands. I love facilitating writing/creative workshops and retreats, especially when they are tied to self-exploration and self-expression. In Indonesian, 'beradadisini' means being here. So, here I am, documenting life—one word at a time.