“There’s nothing like the rain, falling down again… to come and wash away the pain. There’s nothing like the rain, falling down again… to clear the air so we see again.”
(Nothing Like The Rain by 2 Unlimited)

You’re back.

I am surpised to know that after all these times, you’re still strolling along with me in this journey, though you’re not walking by my side any longer.
To notice your presence is one thing.
To accept it is another thing.

It must be fun for you to put your eyes on me and take a peek on my deepest thoughts, my deepest secrets, my deepest feelings…

To you, my life is nothing but a cheesy kind of movie that, slowly but sure, have turned into your guilty pleasure. Sometimes, the scene of my rise and fall makes you feel a bit emotional inside. Nevertheless, to you, I am merely an actress, and my life is nothing but a cheap entertainment for you to enjoy over a can of beer and a bowl of popcorn.

To be honest, I don’t mind. Though my life is surreal to you, it’s such a pleasure to know that you’re still there. Probably this is the only way for you to be able to understand me better, long after all those past misunderstandings that have accumulated into such a complicated matter.

It’s good to know you’re back,
though I am no longer there.

IMG. http://www.paulscharffphotography.com/Through_The_Window_In_The_Rain.JPG


If you made it this, far, please say 'hi'. It really means a lot to me! :)

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Screenshot 2022-12-08 at 12.43.17
This year, I learned to accept the days when I don't feel motivated, tired, or a bit grumpy. I learned to allow myself to sit with this feeling instead of feeling guilty about it and forcing myself to be productive, socialize, or just get things done.
Photo by Georgia de Lotz on Unsplash
In the end, self-care is not always about doing the things that make us feel good or give us instant gratification. It's also about doing the RIGHT thing: something that is good for us in the long run—even if it may feel hard at times.
Hanny illustrator
I am an Indonesian writer/artist/illustrator and stationery web shop owner (Cafe Analog) based in Amsterdam, the Netherlands. I love facilitating writing/creative workshops and retreats, especially when they are tied to self-exploration and self-expression. In Indonesian, 'beradadisini' means being here. So, here I am, documenting life—one word at a time.